Crossroads and traffic lights

First choice: Dentistry;
Second choice: Engineering;
Third choice: Language - English.

The three courses that I've chosen for UPU. Mama has shown a strong dislike towards my second choice. I think she'd mentioned before that she doesn't want any of her children to work as engineers. One of her excuses is that engineering is not a career fit for a woman since you'd have to survey buildings or roads or whatever it is that you have to survey under the scorching sun that's bound to leave unwanted dark tans on your skin. Uh, something like that I think. Pish-posh. Papa doesn't seem to mind much--or rather, at all. I think he's cool with my second choice as he doesn't seem to show any signs of discomfort about it.

Since the UPU form can be edited up to three times, I'll do so in the near future after examining this map so that I can drive on the 'right' road. No, I have not gotten my license yet. Although I have passed the table test (44/50) and I'll be attending another workshop that will most likely cast monkeys to cling onto my eyelashes.

Now that I think about it, it isn't like in those dramas or movies about following your dreams and making those dreams become reality. According to my dream--my ultimate dream, that is--I want to be a full-time writer but I don't see it coming true any time soon. Or any time later but who knows right? Maybe I'll be one in my pension years. I didn't want to be a dentist at first. Taking people's teeth out doesn't seem interesting to me. Mama was the one who constantly suggested it to me. Getting the hint, I set 'dentistry' as my goal. I still do. I do want to be a dentist now so it's all good, I guess. What I don't want is to study medicine. Dentistry and medicine are almost alike but isn't medicine more complicated since it covers the whole human body?

Mama intends to alter my second choice to medicine. I haven't really discussed my dislike towards it yet but I will. Some time later. Eventually. I will. Another thing that has added to my "Why not med" list is that I'm afraid that if I am unable to study dentistry (Ya Allah, tolonglah jangan. Amin.), I wouldn't be qualified to study medicine also. My cousin said that the case where one is denied to taking dentistry but not medicine seldom occurs. SELDOM. RARE. And so if that happens, that'd mean I would be driven to my last resort: teaching English as a second language. But if my second choice remains unchanged, I might be qualified to study engineering which is still related to science and mathematics. I don't want to take something which makes me think that two years of Additional Mathematics, Physics, Chemistry and Biology (more stress on the latter) to just sink down the deep drain into eternal abyss.

"It doesn't matter. It's still knowledge." Yeah, yeah, I get that BUT STILL. I like the fact that I've studied those subjects; that I've filled my mind with some scientific knowledge though I can't help to think of the ugly truth which is that these subjects will not be any use to me if I don't proceed with studies that are related to science and mathematics.

There are a lot of jobs out there, hundreds or perhaps more. Albeit to the eyes of some people, some jobs that are considered to be insufficient in some ways (eg: won't put meat, veggies, sushi, fish, whatever it is that you like to eat, on the table) are hidden.

A: Money makes the world go round.
B: Uh, no paper, the material that money is made of, is not bestowed the ability to do that. Physics does.
A: Whoops. Doesn't matter if you don't have the cash to prove that theory.

It's all money nowadays. Wait. How the hell did I wind up here?

Wearing a mask of hypocrisy now.

Mama didn't mention only money though. She did mention the teaching profession in which you can acquire the noble title, "Teacher" if you finally become one. So it's not just money.

Confused. The light is currently red so I have some time to think until it changes into yellow, when SPM results come out and I have to decide everything regarding this matter. When the green light finally glows, the drive continues and I really hope I'll drive into the right route.